2015 CFBBQ Season Previews: New York Mets

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Projected Lineup

2B: Dangle Em Herpies

LF: My Kegel Dyer

3B: Dave Dried

1B: Lou Cast Tudor

C: Trapeze Doorknob

RF: Grotesque Ranger Sewn

SS: Will Mufflers

CF: On Land Cars

SP: Me Turvy

SP: Barter Loco Loan

SP: Jonny’s

SP: Squealer

SP: Shake Of Pogrom

Off-season Haiku

You got a shortstop?

One that’s not Wilmer Flores.

Where’s Rey Ordonez?

Farthest Home Run of 2014
Lucas Duda off Kevin Correia – 457 feet

Lucas Duda quietly hit 30 home runs in 2014. This was the longest of those 30.

Shortest Home Run of 2014
Lucas Duda off Vance Worley – 341 feet

Wait, Lucas Duda hit 30 home runs in 2014? Huh. This was the shortest of those 30.

Best Names in the Farm System

  •  RHP Rainy Lara
  • C Xorge Carillo
  • OF Maikis De La Cruz
  • RHP Dawrin Frias
  • RHP Chris Flexen
  • RHP Persio Reyes
  • LHP Paul Paez
  • SS Yeixon Ruiz
  • 3B Nelfi Zapata
  • OF Champ Stuart
  • RHP Gaither Bumgardner
  • RHP Martires Arias
  • RHP Scarlyn Reyes
  • RHP Edioglis Villasmil
  • OF Tucker Tharp
  • RHP Nicco Blank
  • RHP Yoryi Nuez
  • LHP David Roseboom
  • OF Wuilmer Becerra
  • RHP Nabil Crismatt
  • 1B Dash Winningham
  • OF Hengelbert Rojas
  • RHP Gregorix Estevez
  • RHP Merandy Gonzalez
  • RHP Luis Popa
  • RHP Ygnacio Rondon
  • RHP Bladimil Vallejo
  • 3B Yeffry De Aza
  • 3B Rigoberto Terrazas
  • OF Ysidro Pierre
  • RHP Wuender Fernandez
  • RHP Enmanuel Berihuete

Three Bold Predictions

  • Noah Syndergaard gets called up in May and opens his own Which Wich sandwich shop inside the Mets clubhouse. Bobby Parnell asks for a trade.
  • Bartolo Colon shows up to spring training in the best shape of his life: spherical.
  • Mets fans will be disappointed with the season. Wait. That’s not bold.

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