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LF: Bet Carton Her
CF: Jay Cubby Hells Perry
RF: Carl O’Spelled Wrong
C: Prying My Gang
1B: Marked Escher-A
3B: Shake Said Lee
DH: Carriage Owns
2B: Steve Andrew
SS: Deed Eager Glorious
SP: Sea Seesaw Bath Yeehaw
SP: Massive Hero Tanker
SP: My Kelp An Nader
SP: Neigh Thin Ne-Yo Balding
SP: Crisp Cup Toronto
Off-season Haiku
They’ll get Scherzer, right?
Lester? Hanley? Moncada?!?!
Nope. Just Chase Headley.
Farthest Home Run of 2014
Carlos Beltran off Edward Mujica – 434 feet
This relatively unspectacular Farthest Home Run of 2014 is yet another example of the Yankees’ relatively unspectacular 2014.
Shortest Home Run of 2014
Brett Gardner off Marcus Stroman – 331 feet
This home run was terrible but man, even when he gives up home runs, I continue to be extremely impressed by Marcus Stroman. Dat movement.
Best Names in the Farm System
- RHP Andury Acevedo
- RHP Wilking Rodriguez
- RHP Nick Rumbelow
- OF Slade Heathcott
- LHP Rigoberto Arrebato
- RHP Nick Goody
- RHP Zach Nuding
- 1B Greg Bird
- OF Jake Cave
- LHP Dietrich Enns
- RHP Brett Gerritse
- SS Cito Culver
- 2B Angelo Gumbs
- 2B Derek Toadvine
- OF Ericson Leonora
- OF Danny Oh
- RHP Cale Coshow
- RHP Rookie Davis
- RHP Giovanny Gallegos
- LHP Justin Kamplain
- LHP Evan Rutckyj
- C Kale Valera
- SS Abiatal Avelino
- 1B Bubba Jones
- OF Yeicok Calderon
- OF Claudio Custodio
- LHP Andrew Chin
- C Radley Haddad
- SS Vicente Conde
- SS Jose Javier
- 3B Renzo Martini
- RHP Dayton Dawe
- LHP Jonny Drozd
- RHP Deshorn Lake
- RHP Manolo Reyes
- LHP Orby Tavares
- C Roybell Herrera
- SS Thairo Estrada
- C Rainiero Coa
- SS Angel Aguilar
- SS Yancarlos Baez
- LHP Havid Burgos
- RHP Raynel Espinal
- RHP Anyelo Gomez
- RHP Raudy Guzman
- RHP Hershelon Juliana
- RHP Bringnel Mendez
- C Jerry Seitz
- SS Griffin Garabito
- 2B Welfrin Mateo
- OF Greidy Encarnacion
- OF Dario Unda
- RHP Freddery Arias
- RHP Jeris Casanova
- LHP Corby McCoy
- RHP Leyfer Ramirez
- C Algeni Mateo
- 2B Tirson Guzman
- SS Yonauris Rodriguez
- OF Yeangel Pujols
- OF Wascar Rodriguez
Three Bold Predictions
- Alex Rodriguez plays 150 games, and hits over .300 with 40+ dingers. The New York Post sports section goes out of business soon thereafter.
- Towards the end of spring training, Didi Gregorius legally changes his name to “Derek Jeter”, making life hell for Michael Kay and David Cone up in the booth.
- Mark Teixeira loses 24 pounds, but his lap gains 32 pounds.
it’s a golden age for yankee farmhand name tools; but above the rest rises “yeicock.”