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3B: My Carp Enter
RF: Geese Sauna Ward
LF: May Taller Day
1B: Might Add Hems
SS: Chaw Nipple Alter
C: Yawn Dire Mole Cleaner
2B: Cold Hen Wrong
CF: Sanjay
SP: Dad The Main Right
SP: Land Sling
SP: Jaw Nail Achey
SP: Mic Quinoa Ca-caw
SP: Careless Martinis
Off-season Haiku
Shelby for Jason.
That’s all I can remember.
Rest in peace, Oscar.
Farthest Home Run of 2014
Randal Grichuk off Ryan Dennick – 449 feet
You probably thought that Matt Holliday bomb was the farthest Cardinals dinger of the year, but Grichuk’s homer actually edged that one out by a few feet, according to HitTracker.
Shortest Home Run of 2014
Oscar Taveras off Odrisamer Despaigne – 355 feet
One hell of a swing. He will be missed.
Best Names in the Farm System
- LHP Jonathan Cornelius
- RHP Jordan Swagerty
- C Travis Tartamella
- 2B Breyvic Valera
- 3B Patrick Wisdom
- OF Nick Martini
- RHP Pedro Echemendia
- RHP Silfredo Garcia
- RHP Dixon Llorens
- LHP Iden Nazario
- C Dante Rosenberg
- C Gerwuins Velazco
- 3B Ildemaro Vargas
- RHP Kyle Barraclough
- C Steve Bean
- 3B Ronnierd Garcia
- 2B Richy Pedroza
- 1B Justin Ringo
- OF Rowan Wick
- LHP Dewin Perez
- RHP Daniel Poncedeleon
- SS Leobaldo Pina
- SS Robelys Reyes
- OF Kenny Peoples-Walls
- RHP Jery Then
- RHP Dailyn Martinez
- 1B Jesus Ustariz
- OF Bladimil Franco
- OF Magneuris Sierra
- RHP Silas Bohannan
- RHP Frederis Parra
- 2B Malik Collymore
- OF DeAndre Asbury-Heath
- RHP Sandy Alcantara
- RHP Franyel Casadilla
- RHP Will Changarotty
- RHP Oneiver Diaz
- RHP Junior Fernandez
- 2B Wadye Ynfante
Three Bold Predictions
- After misreading the giant “Big Mac Land” sign in left field as “Big Mark Land”, Mark Reynolds is so motivated to succeed that he develops a Bonds-like approach at the plate and posts a .951 OPS with 47 home runs, 37 to Big Mark Land.
- As the newest Matt on the team, reliever Matt Belisle is forced to change his his first name. Jhonny Peralta suggests “Mhatt”, and it sticks. Mhatt Belisle has a stellar year, with career hhighs in strikehouts and hholds.
- John Lackey struggles mightily in the first half of the season and loses his rotation spot to young lefty Marco Gonzales, prompting this exchange:
Mike Matheny: John, we can’t afford to throw you out there every fifth day. We’re putting you in the pen.
John Lackey: