Part 7: ARE THEY RELATED ?!?!?!?!?!?!?

The Best. 

Click here for Part 6. 

MICHAEL AND DELMON YOUNG

These similarly terrible baseball players joined forces this year to bring defensive incompetence to the Phillies and have looked incredibly smooth doing so. While Delmon might lack the #class that Michael possesses, he makes up for it when it comes to weak groundouts to the infield and a polarizing presence at the plate. It really is hard to deny the moral differences between these two. they both appreciate negative WAR more than any other name-sharing couple in the majors and that has to count for something.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 61%

EVAN AND EVA LONGORIA

I’m just gonna assume that one of their birth dates is a lie and these two are quite obviously twins. I also assume that their parents names are also Eva and Evan, and that they couldn’t be happier about the immense success of their children. Evan is often embarrassed about his twin sister, and doesn’t like talking about her. Eva tries her best to stay connected but Evan, being the stubborn brother, just wants to do his own thing. I don’t blame him. God Bless the Longorias.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 98%

GORDON AND DAVID BECKHAM

Once referred to as “a right-handed Chase Utley”, Gordon has been less than stellar in his stint as a major leaguer. Gordon might have more career homers than David, but everyone’s favorite/least favorite futbol star crushes Gordon when it comes to underwear advertisements and Being Married To A Spice Girl. The physical comp is intriguing; they’re both about 6″0 185 lbs. There is long lost brother potential here, although I’d imagine if David was Gordon’s older brother, their parents would be kind enough to tell Gordon that he at least has some financial security once he realizes he can’t hit major league pitching.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 44%

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Part 3: ARE THEY RELATED ?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Roy Oswalt says hello.

Part 1.

Part 2.

A.J. AND PETER GRIFFIN

Extremely similar body types, both wear glasses, and I think we can safely assume Peter would wear number 64 if he played baseball. One might point out that Peter is a fictional character, making it impossible to truly relate him to the young Oakland starter with the nasty curveball. In this case, I think there are enough uncanny similarities to at least wonder if their parents are second cousins or something. I’m open to being convinced otherwise.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 47%

TYRELL AND LEEROY JENKINS

I like a good challenge. Here we have the high-ceiling Cardinals pitching prospect whose Twitter handle is @BrothaJenkins, and arguably the most famous character in video game history. If you haven’t seen the video, just click on LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY’s name above. Sure, Tyrell can spin a pretty sick breaking ball. But could he do what Leeroy did in that legendary moment of WoW? Probably not. That takes a special kind of blood that I’m not sure Tyrell has proved he has yet. The potential is there, but I’m not buying it yet.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 16%

BRAUN RAZORS, EVA BRAUN AND RYAN BRAUN

A brand of inanimate objects, the former wife of Adolf Hitler, and one of the best players in baseball who happens to be a Jew.

% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 1000000%