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After roughly two weeks of grueling competition between 64 of our favorite names from ancient baseball history, we have reached a triumphant conclusion. After three days of championship voting, a winner has been crowned.
2. Shadrack McHooveter (56.7%) vs. 3. Pretzels Getzien (43.3%)
To recap our champion’s historic run, I’ll seek to answer three simple questions.
How did Shadrack McHooveter get to this point?
In Round 1, the #2 seed Shadrack was matched up against what we thought to be the toughest #15 seed: Cliff Doom. Shad and his supporters were hardly intimidated, handing doom a defeat of biblical proportions: 76% of the vote — the highest % he would ultimately receive all tournament.
Round 2 presented Shadrack with the first of three consecutive juvenile competitors, this being one of the two Dick Jokes in the tournament: #10 seed Dick Powers. The Dick Jokes proved to be a tough test for anyone unfortunate enough to have to face them, but McHooveter McHooved by Powers with just under 51% of the vote to advance to the Sweet 16.
After surviving the Dick, Shadrack was now faced with the butts; underdog #14 seed Clovis Butts, to be exact. Early support for Butts eventually faded, as Shadrack surged ahead and advanced with a solid yet unspectacular 54% of the vote.
The Elite Eight presented Shadrack with another Cinderella story that tickled a lot of voters’ fancies in the form of #13 seed Dizzy Nutter. After countless cries against the under-seeding of Mr. Nutter, his strongest supporters seemed to fall silent for this crucial stage in the tournament, only mustering 42% any of the vote to Shadrack’s 58%. McHooveter moved on.
The Final Four was undoubtedly Shadrack’s most difficult challenge: the #1 overall seed and perennial powerhouse, Ten Million. Those crying Real Names Over Nicknames had no argument against Million’s genuine moniker, and yet, Shadrack managed to edge out an incredible victory by a mere nine votes against the Ten Million Dollar Man. Many argued that this deserved to the be the championship match-up — I can’t say I disagree. Regardless, Shadrack advanced to the final stage.