So you’ve probably seen the ad for a new show on FOX called DADS.
Screw DADS. We made our own TV show and it’s better:
From left to right: Tracy, Cordero, Qualls, Billingsley.
Scherzering the Other Tigers
Max Scherzer has this thing with his eyes which has a scientific name that I do not know. He has one blue eye and one brown eye, which is pretty cool. What if the rest of the Tigers also looked like that?
The Rest of The Pitching Staff
The Starting Nine
Leyland
A Jim Leyland Comic
This is conversation that actually happened before Game 2 of the ALCS between Jim Leyland and Joe Torre.
ALDS Game 5 Drinking Game
DISCLAIMER (mostly for our mothers): As many of you know, we are only 18 years old. So while everyone else can play this game with alcohol, we will OBVIOUSLY not be doing so. We’ll be enjoying our juice boxes. Thank you and drink responsibly.
Tonight, the Oakland Athletics will be playing the Detroit Tigers in a game of baseball. The loser will be rewarded with a vacation while the winner will be punished and forced to fly to Boston. Here is your guide to making this game five one you’ll definitely forget:
You Drink When…
It goes without saying that you drink every time a #MUP is lit, but here are some other guidelines:
PREGAME SHOW
Drink any time…
- Pedro Martinez makes you smile
- Adam Jones winks
- TBS screws up a graphic
- There’s a replay of Josh Reddick vs. Fan
IN GAME
Drink when…
- Justin Verlander goes behind 3-0
- TOOTBLAN
- Yoenis Cespedes walks
- There’s an instance of BABIP Magic
- Alex Avila looks bored
- Jim Leyland has his hands in his pants
- Jim Leyland smokes a cig
- Miguel Cabrera looks like he’s in a lot of pain as he runs
- Miggy smiles at the pitcher
- The camera zooms in on Sonny Gray’s mustache
- You complain about how terrible the TBS broadcast is
#MUPWATCH: MUPDATE 1
If you are reading this you probably know what #MUPWATCH is. If you don’t you should get a Twitter account and then watch this video. Please also follow @jessespector and @amandarykoff for all your #MUPWATCH needs.
As of 2:37 ET on Monday, October 7th, there have been 32 instances of baseball related #MUP lightings.
Of those 32 baseball-related #MUPS that were lit over the past week, 24 of those were lit in TBS promo ads. TBS’ #MUP lighting habits are absolutely deplorable and downright disturbing. Here’s a team by team breakdown:
The Pirates lead the pack in lit #MUPS as their storybook season has taken a dangerous turn. Not far behind them are the St. Louis Cardinals. The Cardinals must change their ways before more #MUPS fall to the arson’s torch. The Braves and the Red Sox only have one #MUP lit apiece and have done a fantastic job of keeping #MUPS out of harm’s way. Scientists believe the Navy/Red color scheme might be keeping the #MUPS safe, but I personally think that the #MUP lighters, whomever they may be, tend to stay away from foam tomahawks and beards.
The remaining related baseball #MUPS are as follows:
- A lit #MUP at PNC park. At least the #MUP’s last memory was in a nice place.
- A #MUP reportedly lit at Dodger Stadium stuck in post game traffic.
- A Fenway Park #MUP.
- I heard a #MUP at Busch Stadium in St. Louis. I will never be the same.
- A whopping four #MUPS were set ablaze on the Rays Radio Broadcast despite four separate orders from David Price to “SAVE IT NERDS.”
- Three more unspecified #MUPS. May the families of these unclaimed #MUPS find peace in these troubling days.
Our Fall TBS Show Ideas
The LDS on TBS have been somewhat of a disaster. The only thing worse than the production of the games are the shows advertised in between innings. We decided to put our money where our mouths are (which is gross if you think about it) and came up with our own baseball themed TBS show ideas.
Cuban Mistletoe Crisis
Premise: Oh no! It’s almost Christmas, but Yoenis Cespedes and his countrymen Yasiel Puig, Jose Fernandez, Jose Dariel Abreu, and Jorge Soler don’t have any mistletoe to hang up at their Christmas dinner.
Pitch: The rise of Cuban players has been one of the biggest stories in baseball this year. And everyone loves Christmas!
Mike Trout Highlights
Premise: Baseball Jesus just does things while we watch.
Pitch: Would instantly be the best show on television.
Spelling Xander Bogaerts
Premise: The top 10 finishers in last year’s National Spelling Bee have to spell baseball’s unspellable names.
“Can you use that in a sentence?”
“Sure. I went to the grocery store and was promptly robbed by a cross-faded Jarrod Saltalamacchia”
Pitch: Who doesn’t want to watch 10 Indian kids disappoint their parents while Adeiny Hechavarria and Matt Tuiasosopo laugh at them?
Episode 10: Mark Ferrin, Scott Spiezio and America’s ROOGY
Yeah, we showed some #want and cranked this out in a single afternoon. It’s a milestone episode so we got Mike/Mark/Montreal Ferrin of Fringe-Average and MLB Network radio fame. You can follow him @MikeFerrinSXM. We talked about Cuban baseballers, the playoffs, the mid-west, and The Godfather. No e-mails this week, except for one from Big Poop because duh. Baseball talk includes OUR SUPER EXCITING PLAYOFF PICKS. Jake’s Varsity Baseball Update is a big one; JAKE IS BECOMING A PITCHER. Tweet us your congratulations and condolences. TALES FROM LOGDOG is back for the second time with our good friend Lana Berry and we discussed this Miley Cyrus Hedgehog parody video and how she survived #DoLoThroDo. We concluded with a nice family friendly story about Scott Spiezio and Chad Bradford. Seriously. Thanks for listening <3
Dat facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/CespedesFamilyBBQ
TWEETERZ: https://twitter.com/CespedesBBQ
iTunes link (SUBSCRIBE AND RATE AND REVIEW): https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/cespedes-family-barbecue-cespedes/id683535357
Our musical guest/intro music (besides Jake singing Wrecking Ball): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvkHIZg_954
MUPWATCH
For those of you that don’t know TBS has chosen the Fall Out Boy song “Light Em Up” to be the official song of whatever the hell. What we need you to do is hit us up with a #MUPWATCH whenever you hear the song on a broadcast. We want to tally how many #MUPS we see over the course of the playoffs.
#LIGHTAMUP
2013 Regular Season Review: THE FUN STUFF (The Hitters)
On Monday, the Tampa Bay Rays defeated the Texas Wranglers last night for the exciting opportunity to go to Cleveland, Ohio for a night of competitive baseball. What a treat. Last night, the Pittsburgh Pirates WON A PLAYOFF GAME against the Cincinnati Reds in the NL Wild Card game and will move on to face the St. Louis Best Organization In Baseball. Honestly, I’m still mourning the death of the ridiculous 2013 regular season and I probably will be for a while. In an effort to remember the year that was and because I spend so much time on FanGraphs anyway, I’m gonna just gonna go through a multitude of interesting statistical finishes throughout baseball and maybe possibly probably not say a few things about them. We will probably do some sort of CFB Awards post after or later in the postseason, but this is what I’ve got for now. And again, thank you based FanGraphs for being too good to be true.
Important:
- Qualified hitters = minimum 500 PA’s
- Qualified starters = minimum 162 innings pitched
- Qualified relievers = minimum 49 innings pitched
- Qualified defenders = minimum 900 innings at a position
I’m gonna do this in four parts: hitters, starting pitchers, relievers and crazy stupid defensive numbers.
We start with the guys that hit the balls with the bats.
HITTERS:
Let’s Talk About WAR:
- Mike Trout completed his second consecutive 10 win season, finishing with 10.4 WAR. A healthy lead over second place Andrew McCutchen who finished at 8.2 WAR. A brief list of guys who Mike Trout has already surpassed in CAREER WAR: Matt Kemp, Andre Ethier, Nick Markakis, Justin Upton, Buster Posey, Ryan Howard (lolololololol), Marco Scutaro, Josh Willingham and Justin Morneau. Put it this way: there are only 55 players that have produced more WAR since beginning of the 2006 season than Mike Trout has since he came up. Mike Trout the best.
Cespedes Family Preview: The Tiebreaker
RAYS!
RANGERS!!!
162 games have deemed themselves irrelevant as the fate of two baseballing establishments boils down (really a gross phrase if you think about it) to one night. If you were looking for legitimate analysis, you clicked on the wrong link bud. Instead, we gave you some funny pictures:
Dragon Darvish
CESPEDES FAMILY BARBECUE 