Previewing the 2013 Home Run Derpy

Several weeks ago, Ian Miller and Riley Breckenridge were talking about the upcoming Home Run Derby on their Prodcast. There was an off-hand comment about how they should have a Home Run Derpy tournament instead. So if we’re stealing the idea…we apologize deeply. But it was a difficult thing to pass up. This isn’t exactly a tournament, but it’s an appreciation of our eight participants in a slightly different manner. It’s a shame Jeff Karstens won’t be the one pitching to them next Monday night. Anyway, let’s get started.

The American League

CAPTAIN: New York Yankees 2B Robinson Cano

Baltimore Orioles 1B Chris Davis

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Chris(t) Davis Hits 34th Home Run, Is Religion

The Most Holy of Men

Since the dawn of civilization, mankind has looked towards religion as a way to explain the way the world works. While there are differences in all of them, creation myths and deities tend to have significant through-lines, and tonight I feel prepared to publish my explanation as to why this happens. In the past, we have shown that Chris Davis is actually Jesus, but I believe there is more to it than that, that if you look closer, you can find Chris Davis in all religions.

Thor

THORDAVIS

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Random Lad Named Jason “Recommends” Something

So, today the three of us were at the Baseball Prospectus event at Nationals Park (Jordan and Jake are currently traveling towards Akron, Ohio, with the goal to get to Clinton, Iowa, because they are crazy people), and we basked in the glory of Mike Mason Milhouse Malcolm Mark Ferrin, Jason Cole, Joe Hamrahi, a war-torn Jay Jaffe, Zach Mortimer, and other BP writers and associates. Internet friends came out in force for the event,  which also featured incredibly handsome Nationals Front Office members, and others. Oh wait I forgot someone who was there….. Oh yeah, the one shining star of Baseball Prospectus the entire internet, Jason Parks. We ended up talking with Parks, and for some dumb reason he checked out the blawg, and for reasons we still are not sure of, liked it.

Our Twitter following is surging and we are getting our largest number of page views for a day that does not involve Chris Davis wearing no shirt. Praise be unto you all.

NEW CHRIS DAVIS SHIRTLESS PICS

So I was at my grandfather’s house the other day cleaning up some of his old stuff in the basement. As I sifted through piles of aged rubbish, I couldn’t help but think that there might be something valuable for me to find. Lo and behold, under a pile of 30 year old pharmacy receipts, I found something wonderful. Something incoherently perfect. Something bold, beautiful, and bicep-laden. I found new Chris Davis photos. Total coincidence that he hit two bombs today. Drool at your own safety.

This pic shows Davis in peak physical shape; his 8-pac bulging out of his Thor-like chest.

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