We’re a little under two months into the 2013 regular season. Last week, we mourned the loss of White Sox second baseman Jeff Keppinger’s epic streak towards OBP disaster. And while his wRC+ remains at a staggeringly low 19, we can’t marvel at his incompetence quite as much anymore. However, he does remain the only qualified hitter in baseball with only two walks. And he’s up to 172 plate appearances.
I understand that catchers are the type of position player that you would ever expect to steal. They’re are very very few in today’s game with anything that even resembles average speed, let alone base-stealing ability. Regardless, I took a look at some career stolen base totals for some active catchers and oh my god let’s relate it to Barry Bonds because Barry Bonds etc.
So.
Earlier in his epic career, Barry Bonds actually stole a ton of bases. He was rather skinny and very quick on the basepaths, stealing a career high 52 bags in his 1990 campaign with Pittsburgh, and stealing at least 28 in nine other seasons. But let’s fast forward to the end of Barry Bonds’ career…
Last outing, Yu threw 130 pitches over 8 solid innings against the Tigers. Today, Yu Darvish will face the Oakland Athletics at home.
Well, I suppose it was inevitable but that doesn’t make it any easier. Ever since I noticed Jeffrey Scott Keppinger’s walkless existence around 50 plate appearances in, I had made it my duty to spread his impatience across the interwebz. And in the blink of an eye, it was over.
Yesterday was Minnesota Twins first baseman/designated hitter Justin Morneau’s 32nd birthday. What is interesting about Justin Morneau ?
Here are some of my favorite pictures of Justin Morneau:
Today is San Diego Padres reliever Luke Gregerson’s 29th birthday. What is interesting about Luke Gregerson ?
Here are some of my favorite pictures of Luke Gregerson:
Okay, here we are again. It’s the seventh Monday morning of the 2013 season and oh my god Jeffrey Scott Keppinger has still not walked through ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE PLATE APPEARANCES.
There are so many ridiculous things about this that are not being talked about nearly enough.
Yu Darvish will start this evening against the Houston Astros. Last time Darvish faced Houston, he was one out away from a perfect game. Since it’s Yu Darvish and since it’s Houston, we can pretty much expect the same thing. So get pumped. Here are three professional Japanese hitters that had absolutely no chance against Yu’s four-seam fastball.
Ugh, kilometers, I know. That’s 97 MPH.
The Best.
MICHAEL AND DELMON YOUNG
These similarly terrible baseball players joined forces this year to bring defensive incompetence to the Phillies and have looked incredibly smooth doing so. While Delmon might lack the #class that Michael possesses, he makes up for it when it comes to weak groundouts to the infield and a polarizing presence at the plate. It really is hard to deny the moral differences between these two. they both appreciate negative WAR more than any other name-sharing couple in the majors and that has to count for something.
% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 61%
EVAN AND EVA LONGORIA
I’m just gonna assume that one of their birth dates is a lie and these two are quite obviously twins. I also assume that their parents names are also Eva and Evan, and that they couldn’t be happier about the immense success of their children. Evan is often embarrassed about his twin sister, and doesn’t like talking about her. Eva tries her best to stay connected but Evan, being the stubborn brother, just wants to do his own thing. I don’t blame him. God Bless the Longorias.
% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 98%
GORDON AND DAVID BECKHAM
Once referred to as “a right-handed Chase Utley”, Gordon has been less than stellar in his stint as a major leaguer. Gordon might have more career homers than David, but everyone’s favorite/least favorite futbol star crushes Gordon when it comes to underwear advertisements and Being Married To A Spice Girl. The physical comp is intriguing; they’re both about 6″0 185 lbs. There is long lost brother potential here, although I’d imagine if David was Gordon’s older brother, their parents would be kind enough to tell Gordon that he at least has some financial security once he realizes he can’t hit major league pitching.
% CHANCE THEY’RE RELATED: 44%
Jake called me yesterday and informed me that he’s been spending this week hiking over 50 miles. “That’s a lot of walking”, I thought. Do you know who else did a lot of walking ? Barry Lamar Bonds.
For his career, Barry Bonds drew 2,558 unintentional walks and 688 intentional walks. He is the all-time leader in both categories. In other words, Barry Bonds walked over 55 MILES as a major leaguer.
So there’s that.
CESPEDES FAMILY BARBECUE 