All Star Break Record Breakers: Pitchers

The baseball season is 6 months long. The baseball season is mostly during the summer. We call the All Star Game “The Mid-Summer’s Classic.” According to all of these points the All Star Game must be the halfway point of the baseball season.

There have been some great performances over the first half of the year, but what could happen in the second half is even more extraordinary. Check that, what will happen in the second half. You see, when a player has a certain amount of stats in the first half (and they usually do), you can always double that amount to find out what that player will have over the course of the year. Its a really good sabermetric strategy and it always always works. Here are a few pitchers who could will shatter records:

Mark Melancon

First Half Stat: 25 Holds

Will Finish The Year With: 50 Holds

Math Involved: 25 + 25 = 50

Significance: I bet you didn’t know the most holds in a season was Luke Gregerson with 40 all the way back in 2010. A record nobody thought would be broken and definitely a record that everyone should keep an eye on.

Kenley Jansen

First Half Stat: 94.9% Fastballs

Will Finish The Year With: 189.8% Fastballs

Math Involved: 94.9% + 94.9%

Significance: If you thought 100% was the limit, Kenley Jansen says you are wrong. He could shatter the previous record of 100% held by hundreds of players. This has the potential to be an unbelievable story later in the year.

David Carpenter

First Half Stat: 108.00 ERA

Will Finish The Year With: 216.00 ERA

Math Involved: (4/.1) + (4/.1)

Significance: Yeah yeah he might not qualify for the ERA title, but so what? If you ignore the innings qualification, the record for highest ERA in a season belongs to Joe Cleary of the 1945 Washington Senators with an astounding ERA of 189.00. Carpenter has a real chance to destroy that if once he pitches just as bad in the second half.

Advertisements

Puigseases

Recently, terms like Puigmania and Puigsanity have floated around the inter-webs. These conditions are serious and must be taken completely seriously. While not deadly, all Puig-related diseases are extremely contagious. Here is a real list of other “Puig-seases” to watch out for.

Puig-arrhea: Symptoms include an uncontrollable urge to release Puigs in various places.

Puig-abetes: Watch how much Puig you intake because it could effect your blood sugar.

The Chicken Puigs: Tiny Puigs will break out all over your body. Don’t scratch unless you want scars.

ADHPuig: You won’t be able to pay attention to anyone else but Puig.

O-Puig-sity: Nearly two thirds of Americans suffer from this. It’s only getting worse.

Scarlet Puig-ver: If you have heat flashes that only Cuban athletes can satisfy, seek immediate help.

Puig-raines:  A splitting Puig-ache. You have a constant need to swing at the first thing that comes anywhere near you.

Puig-atosis: You breath will start to smell like Puig. And that’s something nobody wants to be around.

Puig-monia: You’ll be vomiting up Puigs for days. Highly unpleasant.

Puig-ingitis: Little Puigs crawl up and down your spinal cord and swing violently at each vertebrae as if they’re first pitch fastballs.

Her-Puigs: It’s exactly what you think it is, and it’s awful. Use protection.

Puig-rectile Dysfunction (PD): If you have a Puig longer than four hours, contact your doctor.

These Cleats Are Made For Walking: Puig Approaches

This has been a fun journey this year, keeping track of walk totals on a weekly basis. It gives me an unexplained amount of joy to check FanGraphs on Monday mornings to see who’s been impatient this past week. Yasiel Puig, an undeniable fan of CFB, has clearly taken note of this and has decided to pitch in by allowing me to use his name, Yasiel Puig, in this post.

Thanks, Yasiel Puig. Thank you for not being unintentionally walked once through your first 50 major league plate appearances.

We’ll obviously be watching Yasiel Puig, like the rest of the world, in his KeppQuest to walkless nirvana.

Continue reading

A Puig of Their Own

So I kind of took a break with the whole photo-shopping thing for a couple reasons. I don’t think I’m that good at it, they are extremely cheesy, and they take up a lot of time. Recently, Jordan has been on me about doing more of them so I finally gave in. So without further ado, I present to you the newest Hollywood Blockbuster about one ragtag dreamer who dared to believe: A Puig of Their Own.